The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist - Debbie Mirza

The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist

By Debbie Mirza

  • Release Date: 2019-12-10
  • Genre: Psychology
Score: 4.5
4.5
From 93 Ratings

Description

Choosing Therapy selected this book for the 2020 Best Books on Narcissism and Narcissistic Personality Disorders.

Do you feel confused and exhausted by a relationship, and you can't figure out why?

Do you feel like you can't think straight, and the person in your life seems fine, so you wonder if maybe you are the problem?

Has someone mentioned you might be with a narcissist, or you wonder yourself, but when you research narcissism, they don't seem to completely fit the description, although some of the traits do ring true?

The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist is the most comprehensive and helpful book on the topic of covert narcissism. Also available in Spanish as El Nacisista Pasivo Agresivo.

Find the answers you are looking for. This book delivers:
A list of traits of the covert narcissist and how they look like in daily lifeThe differences between an overt and a covert narcissistA checklist to see if you are with a covert narcissistReal-life stories to illustrate what these traits look likeExplanations of different covert techniques narcissists use to control and manipulateA chapter dedicated to what sex looks like with a covert narcissistDescriptions of covertly narcissistic parentsInformation on what it looks like to have a covertly narcissistic boss or co-workerA chapter on healing to help give you tools and hope for a beautiful future, free of toxic relationships.
You will see that you are not crazy, that your instincts are correct, and you will learn how to see through covert manipulation and control.

The most common description a survivor of this type of relationship will use is crazy-making. The emotional abuse and gaslighting makes you question your own view of reality, and sometimes your own sanity. You will know after reading this book if the person you are with is a covert narcissist, and your experience with them will begin to make sense for the first time.

When most people think of a narcissist, they think of someone who is grandiose, obviously self-absorbed, sees themself as superior to others, and throws fits of rage when they don't get their way. But what if the narcissist is one of the nicest people you've ever met? What if they are a great listener, seem to care about others, or are a pillar of the community? What if they are the mother that volunteers at the school, the husband that your friends wish they had, the boss that your co-workers feel so lucky to work for? Parents, spouses, partners, bosses, and friends who are covert narcissists come across as the nicest people. They can be spiritual leaders, therapists, moms who bring over casseroles to needy people, and bosses who everyone loves.

A covert narcissist has the same traits of narcissism as the well-known overt type. The difference is when they control and manipulate, when they demean and devalue you, it is done in such a subtle way you don't notice it.

This type of narcissism is one of the most damaging forms because the abuse is so hidden and so insidious. You can be in a relationship with a covert narcissist that can last for decades and not realize you are being psychologically and emotionally controlled, manipulated, and abused. There are no visible scars with this form of abuse, and you are usually the only one that experiences their destructive and psychologically debilitating behavior.

Living with a covert narcissist drains your spirit and leaves you questioning your own reality. You have been lied to for years, and it is time to finally see the truth of what you have been through, who you really are, and how much you deserve love and happiness.

Reviews

  • No male perspective

    3
    By Bassis108
    The first chapters of the book are really effective at laying out what CN is but after a while I noticed in ALL of the examples the man is the CN and the woman is the non-CN. Would have been great to get perspective from what it looks like from the opposite gender. There also is copious amount of “Girl, you are so awesome and beautiful” type validation that I just began skim-reading through the chapters towards the end.
  • I’m not crazy or alone!

    5
    By Pooh Lady 09
    This book put language to things I have been feeling and experiencing for years!!
  • Beautiful

    5
    By WishMyMoviesWereOnAmazon
    This book came into my life at the perfect moment. I’ve cried, laughed and filled my south with these words. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. To my dear friend, Joy, thank you also forgot the recommendation. 123
  • Excellent Read

    5
    By Jenntisme
    This book confirmed all my suspicions that I recently survived a 20+ year CN marriage.
  • Thank you!

    5
    By Fart66784
    This book came to me at an ideal time in my healing journey. I was married to a CN for almost 10 years and got so much out of this loving, informative, supportive book. I especially appreciated when Debbie emphasized over and over agin how this is not our fault and that CN’s are drawn to people who are exactly like me and that, post CN, we can heal and live lives full of genuine, authentic love. Thank you, your book is a healing gift!
  • Thank you!

    5
    By thesunwillshineagain
    I bought this book in hopes to find some answers and it provided me with a lot of clarity. After my unique experience, I didn’t think I could find anything to show me that might hunches were valid. Although there were some things that weren’t spot on, there was a lot of info that was really helpful in my journey to healing. If you have a hunch that you know and have been affected by a covert narcissist, buy this book.